She grew up in New York's Catskill Mountains, graduated from the University of Arizona, logged two years in Arkansas with Volunteers in Service to America, and spent 25 years as a television news researcher, writer, producer, and assignment editor in Arkansas, New Mexico, Oregon, and Washington. She founded the Vancouver Writers' Mixers and her hobbies are reading, gardening, and not cooking. She's the author and co-author of ten novels, including An Uncertain Refuge, Hemlock Lake, The Big Grabowski, and Sometimes a Great Commotion.But if you really want to know about her, go to her website. You’ll find she’s led a very interesting life and is really funny.
Please welcome Carolyn J. Rose.
Getting Past the Messages of Childhood
Whenever I plan promotional events or prepare an on-line post about a particular book or my thoughts on writing, those messages from childhood come blaring through my brain.
The same rules that enabled me to “work and play well with others” and earned me good marks in grade school can be barriers to successful promotion. So, a little modification is in order.
For example, a prime message was, “Don’t be pushy.”
If I bought into that 100%, I’d never ask if I could be a guest blogger or have my book listed on a particular site. I’d probably never post on a forum. Heck, I probably wouldn’t even admit that I’m a writer unless someone took me to a stark basement room and beat the information out of me with a rubber hose.
So I’ve spent a lot of time considering the difference between what’s “being pushy” and what’s “promoting your work.”
Pushy, I’ve decided, is cutting in line, taking someone else’s seat, or monopolizing a conversation. Pushy is being all about yourself at the expense of others. Pushy is demanding.
Promotion is presenting. It’s suggesting. That suggestion may be strong and it may be slanted, but it falls short of pushiness.
Another message was, “Don’t compare yourself to others.” The secondary message there was, “Never act superior or better than.”
I try to toe the line on that secondary message (although I’m only human) but comparisons are a tool of the writing trade, a form of shorthand, and a way to allow readers to connect quickly.
Sometimes a Great Commotion is a humorous mystery that deals with environmental issues and takes place in a small town. In descriptive shorthand, I might say the book is in the vein of authors who write similar books. Not just like, not of the same caliber, but similar.
And then there was, “Don’t brag about your success.” That’s a tricky one because the definition of bragging, I’ve found, depends on the perceptions of those being bragged to.
Simply mentioning that I have a new book out might prompt some people to play the “you’re bragging” card. But not mentioning the book closes the door on promotional opportunities. So I try to seek venues where mentioning is appropriate, expected, encouraged, and welcomed. (Like, for example, Helen Ginger’s wonderful blog.)
Then there’s the message I find myself passing on to the high school students I deal with as a substitute teacher, “It’s not all about you.”
It’s tough to defend flaunting that rule—like I’m doing now as I write about myself—so I amend it to read, “It’s not all about you, it’s about the book, the characters, what you’ve learned about the writing process, and what others might find helpful or interesting.”
That shifts the focus just enough that I can shrug off the self-centered, self-conscious feeling and rev myself up to write a news release or answer a blogger’s interview questions or volunteer to teach a workshop at the library.
Finally, there’s this message, “It’s not polite to talk about money.”
Words to live by, then and now. I adhere to that message by making an effort to refer not to books sold, but to readers connected with. That makes promoting feel less like, well, panhandling, and more like getting acquainted with someone who happens to share my table at a coffee shop.
So, hey, let’s get a cup of coffee. And while I’ve got my wallet out, let me show you a picture of the book I just released.
Thank you Carolyn!
If you’d like to buy or see Carolyn’s latest book (isn’t the cover great!), check out An Uncertain Refuge on Amazon.
And you can get more acquainted with Carolyn and all her books on her website.
This was a very interesting post. Carolyn addresses what most of us wonder about - how do we promote our books without sounding haughty. After all, we think our books are fabulous and we want others to think that as well, but if we say that or push too hard, readers can be turned off. She’s told us how she accomplishes this feat. Do you have any advice you can contribute? Or you’re invited to ask Carolyn a question or two. She’ll be dropping by.
nice...love the thoughts on readers connected with...so true...and that will pay off in books sold...
ReplyDeleteEnjoyed the post. :-) And related to it, too, I grew up with a couple of those same childhood admonitions and several others. And it is incumbant upon us as we grow into adulthood to discern which ones to adhere to and with what degree of strictness and understanding of quintessential intent and meaning they were mandated - given the social/familial circumstances in which the edicts were given.
ReplyDeleteI like the way Carolyn worded the process--that promotion is like presentation and suggestion. I struggled for a while with the promo aspect of writing...and still do. But it's something we've all got to come to terms with. Tweeting!
ReplyDeleteI love the picture in the wallet. Let's face it a lot of hard work goes into writing and we should be proud of our work. The post is great.
ReplyDeleteAnn
Sometimes we struggle with our writing. Sometimes it seems to flow from our fingertips. But it's always work.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Carolyn, for a great post!
Thanks for your comments. I'm off to water aerobics - where I might casually work in a reference to my book - and will be back soon to respond.
ReplyDeleteTerrific post. I love the distinction between promotion and pushiness. Vital advice and perspective.
ReplyDeleteI love Carolyn's hobby of not-cooking, I have that one myself too!
ReplyDeleteDefinitely helpful advice here today, it's a fine line we walk as writers promoting our books.
I hope I don't fall over the fine line too often. On some of the sites I frequent I see authors take a verbal beating for being too pushy and I dread being one of them.
ReplyDeleteI hope you'll all let me know if I cross the line.
Nice post. I think it becomes "pushy" when somebody spends the majority of their time talking about their work. Nobody talks about their profession 24/7, even those who love their job like many of us writers do :)
ReplyDeleteLoved your post. There's a right way and a wrong way to talk about the books we've written and what we do with our time as writers. You've nailed it with regard to what will turn people and readers off and what will engage them.
ReplyDeleteThank you.
Patti
Awesome post. And since I know you, I can say you've never come off as "it's all about me," or pushy. Mostly you are the helpful, brilliant, amusing one. I am kind of interested in seeing the wallet sized picture of your book, though. Fabulous idea.
ReplyDeleteI'm guessing that readers want to like us as well as our books.
ReplyDeleteAny thoughts on that?
I'd agree with that, Carolyn. Especially today, when it's so easy to make contact and connect with people, I think readers are coming to expect a certain level of a relationship with authors, and authors need to be open to that.
ReplyDeleteI've held back because I didn't want to be pushy.
ReplyDeleteLOL, Alex. Don't hold back.
ReplyDeleteGreat post. I'm going to think about this next time I'm feeling shy or worried I'm pushing too much. Going to check out your book. :D
ReplyDeleteCarolyn, you bring sanity to a process that often seems insane. I feel calm now. Another message from childhood is that you can count on your best friend(s). And fans.
ReplyDeleteI loved the character development and noir atmosphere in Hemlock Lake, the healing of the characters in An Uncertain Refuge, and the hilarious creativity that went into the Devil's Harbor series (Sometimes a Great Commotion and The Big Grabowski).
A fan.
There is a line. If you push too much, readers will turn away. But you're right, Carolyn, it's not always easy to see the line. I think you do a good job.
ReplyDeleteYou can also get around the 'it's not about you' rule by focusing on what you or your book does for others. (And that's what the media wants to know, too.)
ReplyDeleteVery true - and sometimes hard to do with fiction as compared to nonfiction books that fall into the self-help spectrum.
ReplyDeleteAn Uncertain Refuge deals with several themes, but one is domestic violence, so I guess I could say it raises awareness in a fictional way.
That's true, Diane. Instead of constantly pushing or touting your book, you can focus on the readers. If the blog is about writing, then you write about some aspect of writing your book. If the blog is about religion, then you write about the role that plays in your book. You're writing about religion, but using an example or two from your book. You end up promoting your book without yelling, buy my book!
ReplyDeleteCarolyn, I'd love to meet you for a cup of coffee...
ReplyDeleteI love the way Carolyn handles this touchy subject. Very interesting post.
ReplyDeleteHelen, I'm so glad you hosted Carolyn. I hope you sell millions, Carolyn.
Hi Helen .. great post from your guest Carolyn.
ReplyDeleteBeing overbearing just puts people off and having the "I", "I" .. way of life doesn't really help anyone .. so Carolyn's thoughts of this are so down to earth - and that's where we all want to be.
Thanks - a good share and read .. Hilary
It might also help to remember that the majority of us were brought up with those same admonitions, including: It's not all about you. They stick with us into adulthood. We share those "voices" in our heads. I think Carolyn helped us identify those voices.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad I could share and really, really, glad if I helped anyone in any way.
ReplyDeleteThanks for hosting me, Helen.
Thanks for this post, Carolyn! There's a lot of good info for authors here. And thank you Helen for hosting, as always!
ReplyDeleteI totally agree about there being a fine line between pushy and promotion, and it can be tricky figuring out how far is too far. But hitting a balance between talking about yourself, your books, and genereal writing/reading topics that can apply to anyone is good. I like a promo that involves the readers, so it's always nice to hear a little about the author's writing process, as well as the sorts of things they like to read, and where they find inspiration. It's a little more interactive, and I think readers appreciate that, as it gives them something to chat about and discuss. I'm more likely to remember an author I've had a good dialogue with, than an author who's just said "here is my awesome new book, please check it out".
Again, great post. I'll be bookmarking this. :)
Very well said, Carolyn. I look forward to reading your book.
ReplyDeleteInteresting post, thanks Helen and Carolyn.
ReplyDeleteHaving had pushy parents I find it hard to promote myself. The writing community is helping me a great deal. There is a fine line in marketing one's book, and those who bombard me tend to make me back off a bit.
I like your description of a "good" post by a touring author, Jennifer. It's not easy, by any means, but we have to learn to sell without pushing too hard.
ReplyDeleteThanks for all your comments on my post. I've learned a lot from your reactions and contributions and hope to see you all back here in the future.
ReplyDeleteCarolyn, not wanting to be pushy ... or drawing attention to myself ... has been a handicap for me, too ... but, like the old salesman said, "you gotta ask for the sale."
ReplyDeleteThoughtful post, Carolyn. I once asked a fund raiser how she could stand begging for money from people all day. Her response was that she wasn’t asking for money, but helping people determine where philanthropy fit their life goals. I think the same is true of book promotion. Promotion allows readers to determine if certain books fit their need for entertainment and inspiration. I guess that makes promotion all about the readers. Love your books, especially the Devil’s Harbor mysteries!
ReplyDeleteNot cooking is one of my hobbies too >:)
ReplyDeleteCold As Heaven
My family will attest that it's also one of my hobbies, too, Cold As Heaven.
ReplyDeleteGreat post. So "right on" when it comes to the difference between pushing and promoting.
ReplyDeleteSorry I didn't check in much yesterday, but I sent my husband out for Asian food and he brought back so much (it's a guy thing) that I was forced to spend the day nibbling while I wrote.
ReplyDeleteI'm delighted to see so many of you share my hobby: not cooking.
It frees up so much more time to write.
Carolyn, I'm not of the cooking persuasion either. I'd much rather not.
ReplyDeleteI really appreciate this post. It perfectly describes the predicament I'm in now. I was raised under the same thou-shalt-nots, so promotion is hard for me. Thank you for showing me how not to commit "sin" while doing it. :-)
ReplyDelete