Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Two Observations About Writers

A lot of my friends are writers, as I’m sure is the case with most writers. We’re no different from people of other occupations. Lawyers tend to have friends who are also lawyers. Firefighters hang with other firefighters. And we all have friends outside of the circle of work or calling.

I am very thankful for my writer friends. They are the best in the world. Yesterday, I got together with five of those friends. Our lunch ended around five p.m. About three a.m., I woke up, thinking about that gathering. We had a good time, laughing and talking. It renews your soul to hang with good friends who, in this case, are all strong, accomplished women. As I started my second cup of coffee around four, I thought about two things I noticed during our get-together.

One is that, although we’re all writers, we didn’t really talk about writing.

I’ve thought back through the four hours we were together, from the time we gathered at the restaurant until we got into our cars to make the trek back to our homes -- and I can’t really remember talking about what we were working on, or plotting, or researching. No one asked for help on a plot twist. No one described a character. No one discussed an interview for an article. We caught up on what was going on in each other’s lives, outside of writing.

I don’t know if this is true of people in other professions. Do doctors gather for drinks and not discuss patients or cases? Can travel agents meet for coffee and not talk about cruises or exciting locations that have just come onto their radars? Possibly. But this non-discussion of writing seems to happen whenever I gather with these friends. There just seems to be so much to talk about other than our work that the time flies by until we reluctantly have to part.

And that brings me to my second observation. This group of friends, and there are three more who couldn’t make the lunch, are amazing women. Strong, funny, smart, opinionated, loving, giving, loyal … my list of adjectives could go on and on. And sometimes that makes me stop and wonder, how did I end up in this group? How could I have been so fortunate to find myself surrounded by such wonderful women? However it happened, I am thankful.

Perhaps you belong to such a group, be they men or women or a mix, be they writers or some other profession. If so, I’m so glad for you. If not, then I hope you find or begin such a group. A belated New Year’s wish. Everyone should have a support group of wonderful friends.


  1. This is where I think the blogosphere is good as any friendship you strike up often revolves around people's posts and hence you stay around the subject.

    As you get to know them better the topics widen of course, but you still keep coming back to the topic of interest. In this case writing and books.

  2. There are always different levels or types of friendship, even if the friendship centers around the same connection. I have a friend whom I met years ago through the Internet. We've never met in person, yet we email just about every day on subjects from writing to politics to the totally absurd. And there are others who I know through the blog or my newsletter and writing stays the only topic of discussion. The same is true of writers I know personally. Some focus on writing; others go deeper.

    I'm thankful for all these friends, but the ones I feel I know the best and am the closest to are those whose lives I'm "part" of in a personal way. And I guess when you think about it, that would be true of anyone, any friendship, no matter what the relationship was based on in the beginning.


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